Thinking Back

A few days ago I was sitting in the dentist's office waiting as usual, and I stumbled on a local magazine that featured average SAT scores at local high schools. I then began to think about my average SAT score from 1990 (www.infoplease.com/ipa/. My GPA helped that average score, and fortunately I was awarded an academic scholarship to a pretty good school. Unfortunately, I needed a $500 deposit for the dorms. I didn't really understand how the scholarship worked and knew my dad didn't have the $$$. So I called the school and told them I would not be attending in the fall. Really simple, really quick. My next call was to the U.S. Army. What I still think about often is why no one tried to stop me. I wonder why the counselor at school did not intervene. Although I was a very quiet student, my favorite teacher did not even ask me what I was doing. My parents were more worried about "Why I wanted to be a man?" than about giving up that scholarship. Moreover, why didn't I ask...I just gave up. I wonder what would have happened to me if I had gone to college right after high school...I sometimes think about this. I guess writing papers about the digital divide and access make me contemplate my own literacy and educational journey.